Once again, time has gotten away from me!

Good morning all, Its a cold winter morning, just 9 degrees Fahrenheit here in Massachusetts. The sun is shining, we have not yet had a snowfall of more than a dusting. THe rest of the country and much of Europe have been digging out for over a month, one can truly see how the earth's changes are affecting us. According to the Mayan calender and predictions, the magnetic poles are switching... we are experiencing strange weather patterns, lots of earthquakes, and who knows what all is coming.
 Meanwhile, we have daily life to attend to, and it is the holiday season. Personally I have found this hard for years, as my family has never really celebrated and it was only 3 of us for a long time, while all around people gathered in large family groups and did a huge Christmas thing, spending lots of money and enjoying something I only wished to experience. This added to my already 'outside looking in' feeling that I have had all my life concerning most things.
 Darker days, and deep bone-chilling cold, I hibernate through most of it, sleeping a lot, and feeling drugged through much. Is this my Fibro, or S.A.D., or just my protection from feeling left out? All of the above in some way or other I think.
Then I turn around and think, well, I am actually glad that I feel differently from most people, I am am Indigo, I have premonitions, I am in love with nature and have found my path through all my loves of making things and feeling crystals and loving herbs and the moon and all the phases and the magical things of the unseen dimensions... I am a pagan.  And I celebrate Yule, as a celebration in the middle of the coldest darkest time, the return of the light on Sostice, having a tree and feeling in touch with nature and her cycles.
 I only wish I could celebrate openly with understanding from others, instead of condemnation. I wish my family understood and would join me. But it is what it is.
 This year I have my son Ryan here, and now he is experiencing life with my mother to be even more exasperating than I have ever described to anyone else. I feel so sad that we are not being able to do happy things together, that life revolves around the lack of money in this house, that I feel I must hide anything I buy to do fun stuff with because I will be pointed at with the 'where did the money for THAT come from, when you can't pay your bills or any of what you owe ME'. I have in my closet the makings for bird feeding stuff, and have yet to do it because of that.
 Surviving on Disability, KNOWING in my HEART that I can do more, that I can make a living at things I am good at instinctively if given the space physically and emotionally to do so, it makes me crazy.
 And yet, If I believe, as I do, that we make our own lives, create our own experiences, then it is in my hands to change all this. The question is how... and I know that answer too. Having the energy and the focus to do it, daily, ignoring the negativity all around me with concentration and feeling the true joy in my heart... That is where I falter... Often falling asleep as I meditate and do my envisioning how I know the true spirit of those around me is, it is a tough job to follow through on. Yet I know its even tougher to remain with things the way they are.
So as in all things, it is one day at a time, one step at a time... reaching for the better feeling, the  thoughts and ideas that fuel my passion, knowing this will change things even though I cannot yet see the physical manifestation of it .
 

Flowering Tree Botanicals Product Review

Hello everyone. Today is a special edition of my blog, as I have a few new products from my favorite Bath and Body shop called Flowering Tree botanicals.  It is a home business owned and run by 2 women, and the emphasis is on fun and fragrance and safe ingredients. Their prices are great, and Layla is so helpful and fun to buy from. I
received a box with 3 of their newest products.
Today I opened and smelled the Cran Orange Marmalade whipped sugar scrub. It comes in 2 sizes, and I have the smallewr one her, 2 ounces, in a clear plastic recycleable jar. Oh, yum!! I love the sugar scrubs as they are both scrubby and creamy, its sugar so it dissolves without any harsh granules. It turns to a soft gently foaming soap, its great on the face and all over the body! I have found that if I scrub first and then apply water I get a more scrubbed feeling before the sugar dissolves, and then nice and smooth after. Its better than the one I used to buy with ground almonds that I loved and thought I'd always use! And the scents! So many delicious fragrances to choose from!
 After my shower I used the Cranberry Fig Whipped Body Creme, in a smaller version of the same jar, 1 ounce try-me size. Its a lovely delicate scent that is slightly sweet but not overpoweringly so. I was wary of the fig part in the name as there is a well known store that has some other fig scented products that are just way too sweet and strong and though one sniff is nice, they tend to make me a little nauseous after a while.  I had nothing to worry about, this in no way resembles that! Its wonderful. satiny smooth and soaks right in without leaving any residual feel, other that a touch of velvety smoothness. Not greasy at all. When used on my hands, there is no greasy feeling. I do love their cremes, especially in the harsh cold dry air of winter outdoors and the heating indoors! No itchy skin here!
 I have one more product that I have only just opened. Same packaging, and it smells like a pina colada! The fragrance is called Monkey Business, and its a Whipped Soap and Shaving Cream formula that I use in the shower. Also very smooth and moisturizing, I can't get enough of these!
 So my review is not unbiased becaus I already love these products! But one never knows what a new fragrance will be like. All three of these are winners in my book! These are products to make you feel special every day, and I often cannot wait to take my next shower or bath with the goodies from FTB!!!
 Check them out ! On Facebook they are: Flowering Tree Botanicals, http://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=135639719822459&id=100001002550244&notif_t=feed_comment_reply#!/floweringtreebotanicalsfans

and on Etsy The Url is:  http://www.etsy.com/shop/laylaga_search_query=Layla&ga_search_type=seller_usernames
or you can go to http://www.etsy.com/ and enter 'Layla'  in the drop down menu where it says "handmade".

Testing ..one..two..three.. here we go!

It has been nearly 2 years since my last blog post from my other blog.. and I have been meaning and wanting to get one going again. It serves  more than one purpose for me, and it is somewheat scary to share with other people.  Having been sharing more of who I am on Facebook over the last couple of years or so now, getting to know myself better, and becoming stronger in my ability to be myself online, if not here in my mother's house, I feel I am ready to do this.
I have pondered having a particular thing to blog about, but I just can't focus it that way. I have too many interests to do that. So it will be a mishmash of whatever I am feeling and thinking about at the time, and I am not going to apologise for it, LOL. Well, not in advance, anyway. I have learned not to set constraints such as 'never' and 'always' as that is like asking for proof that I'm wrong.
 I would like to introduce myself, but that will happen a little at a time as I go. Suffice it to say I am living in a challenging situation which fustrates me often, and that will come through. I am interested in herbal studies as medicinal and crafts and I love to make tinctures and oils and salves, lip balms and body care products. I also make jewelry, and have a shop on Etsy to sell what I make.
 I love to cook and collect recipes, and on Facebook I have a group called A Cauldron in the Kitchen for serving those interests. I am a Pagan at heart, a witch by nature, and an avid Abraham-Hicks follower.
 I live on an income from disability for now, until such time as I can get my financial feet back under me in some way. I have fibromyalgia, and something else that I can't quite remember the name of at the moment (thank you Fibro). Also other fairly common american health problems. I believe in alternative health care and despise the pharmaceutical companies for what they and the government are doing. I do not believe in the almighty power of doctors, and would much prefer a holistic approach that addresses an underlying problem rather than the symptoms.
 I have two elderly cats who have me wrapped around their tails and whiskers. I love animals and nature and mother earth. I believe in eating as healthily as possible, and in using products that are not filled with chemicals, as unprocessed as possible, as close to nature as possible. I also love my coffee and chocolate, desserts are my weakness!
I think that's probably enough for now...Welcome to my blog.